Why do we love?
I was laying there for a half an hour. I wasn’t awake. I was concious, but not awake.
If I were awake, I would have felt. And the feelings were long gone.
I sometimes wandered and got lost.
My mind was leaving the body, travelling to distant places, but my heart stood in one place. It was not awake.
Why do we always fall for the illusion of love?
For every second that is good, a thousand seconds hurt.
And yet, we do. Almost always, we fall for it.
That’s how desperately we want to hold on to that one second. To never let go. To stay.
There is no moving on after it.
Maybe that second is important because there’s only a few of them in an entire lifetime.
Maybe we want it, just so the pain follows up. Maybe we got used to it along the way.
Life is full of painful maybes and thousands of seconds of not being awake.
Not feeling what was real.
Not trying to feel again. Not being free.
What good do we do when we are not free?
What is it all about?
Why do we live?
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